Donald Rumsfeld is giving the president his daily briefing. He concludes by saying: "Yesterday, 3 Brazilian soldiers were killed in an accident."

"OH NO!" the President exclaims. "That's terrible!"

His staff sits stunned at this display of emotion, nervously watching as the President sits, his head cradled in his hands.

Finally, the President looks up and asks.......... "How many is a Brazillion?"

1. Scary Stories (Series) by Alvin Schwartz
2. Daddy’s Roommate by Michael Willhoite
3. I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings by Maya Angelou
4. The Chocolate War by Robert Cormier
5. The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain
6. Of Mice and Men by John Steinbeck
7. Harry Potter (Series) by J.K. Rowling
8. Forever by Judy Blume
9. Bridge to Terabithia by Katherine Paterson
10. Alice (Series) by Phyllis Reynolds Naylor
11. Heather Has Two Mommies by Leslea Newman
12. My Brother Sam is Dead by James Lincoln Collier and Christopher Collier
13. The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger
14. The Giver by Lois Lowry
15. It’s Perfectly Normal by Robie Harris
16. Goosebumps (Series) by R.L. Stine
17. A Day No Pigs Would Die by Robert Newton Peck
18. The Color Purple by Alice Walker
19. Sex by Madonna
20. Earth’s Children (Series) by Jean M. Auel
21. The Great Gilly Hopkins by Katherine Paterson
22. A Wrinkle in Time by Madeleine L’Engle
23. Go Ask Alice by Anonymous
24. Fallen Angels by Walter Dean Myers
25. In the Night Kitchen by Maurice Sendak
26. The Stupids (Series) by Harry Allard
27. The Witches by Roald Dahl
28. The New Joy of Gay Sex by Charles Silverstein
29. Anastasia Krupnik (Series) by Lois Lowry
30. The Goats by Brock Cole
31. Kaffir Boy by Mark Mathabane
32. Blubber by Judy Blume
33. Killing Mr. Griffin by Lois Duncan
34. Halloween ABC by Eve Merriam
35. We All Fall Down by Robert Cormier
36. Final Exit by Derek Humphry
37. The Handmaid’s Tale by Margaret Atwood
38. Julie of the Wolves by Jean Craighead George
39. The Bluest Eye by Toni Morrison
40. What’s Happening to my Body? Book for Girls: A Growing-Up Guide for Parents & Daughters by Lynda Madaras
41. To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee
42. Beloved by Toni Morrison
43. The Outsiders by S.E. Hinton
44. The Pigman by Paul Zindel
45. Bumps in the Night by Harry Allard
46. Deenie by Judy Blume
47. Flowers for Algernon by Daniel Keyes
48. Annie on my Mind by Nancy Garden
49. The Boy Who Lost His Face by Louis Sachar
50. Cross Your Fingers, Spit in Your Hat by Alvin Schwartz
51. A Light in the Attic by Shel Silverstein
52. Brave New World by Aldous Huxley
53. Sleeping Beauty Trilogy by A.N. Roquelaure (Anne Rice)
54. Asking About Sex and Growing Up by Joanna Cole
55. Cujo by Stephen King
56. James and the Giant Peach by Roald Dahl
57. The Anarchist Cookbook by William Powell
58. Boys and Sex by Wardell Pomeroy
59. Ordinary People by Judith Guest
60. American Psycho by Bret Easton Ellis
61. What’s Happening to my Body? Book for Boys: A Growing-Up Guide for Parents & Sons by Lynda Madaras
62. Are You There, God? It’s Me, Margaret by Judy Blume
63. Crazy Lady by Jane Conly
64. Athletic Shorts by Chris Crutcher
65. Fade by Robert Cormier
66. Guess What? by Mem Fox
67. The House of Spirits by Isabel Allende
68. The Face on the Milk Carton by Caroline Cooney
69. Slaughterhouse-Five by Kurt Vonnegut
70. Lord of the Flies by William Golding
71. Native Son by Richard Wright
72. Women on Top: How Real Life Has Changed Women’s Fantasies by Nancy Friday
73. Curses, Hexes and Spells by Daniel Cohen
74. Jack by A.M. Homes
75. Bless Me, Ultima by Rudolfo A. Anaya
76. Where Did I Come From? by Peter Mayle
77. Carrie by Stephen King
78. Tiger Eyes by Judy Blume
79. On My Honor by Marion Dane Bauer
80. Arizona Kid by Ron Koertge
81. Family Secrets by Norma Klein
82. Mommy Laid An Egg by Babette Cole
83. The Dead Zone by Stephen King
84. The Adventures of Tom Sawyer by Mark Twain
85. Song of Solomon by Toni Morrison
86. Always Running by Luis Rodriguez
87. Private Parts by Howard Stern
88. Where’s Waldo? by Martin Hanford
89. Summer of My German Soldier by Bette Greene
90. Little Black Sambo by Helen Bannerman
91. Pillars of the Earth by Ken Follett
92. Running Loose by Chris Crutcher
93. Sex Education by Jenny Davis
94. The Drowning of Stephen Jones by Bette Greene
95. Girls and Sex by Wardell Pomeroy
96. How to Eat Fried Worms by Thomas Rockwell
97. View from the Cherry Tree by Willo Davis Roberts
98. The Headless Cupid by Zilpha Keatley Snyder
99. The Terrorist by Caroline Cooney
100. Jump Ship to Freedom by James Lincoln Collier and Christopher Collier

• Remember that chick who shared the Purpose Driven Life with her captor in Atlanta? Turns out she shared more than mass-marketed evangelicalism with him. It all makes perfect sense now!

• And this one is really funny -- Pat Robertson has a "age-defying" health shake recipe available for downloading! From the website:

Did you know that Pat Robertson can leg-press 2000 pounds! How does he do it?

Where does Pat find the time and energy to host a daily, national TV show, head a world-wide ministry, develop visionary scholars, while traveling the globe as a statesman?

One of Pat's secrets to keeping his energy high and his vitality soaring is his age-defying protein shake. Pat developed a delicious, refreshing shake, filled with energy-producing nutrients.

Discover what kinds of natural ingredients make up Pat's protein shake by registering for your FREE booklet today!

There's also recipes for age-defying pancakes, a weight loss cookbook, and different plugs for the South Beach diet and GNC health stores

Those who do not bathe, and those who do -- in cheap cologne, not water.

Many people deny that legalized gay marriage is the beginning of a "slippery slope" (a taboo term these days) for the institution of marriage. I couldn't tell you definitively whether or not this is the case, but I can say that the latest news from The Netherlands and Belgium doesn't come as a surprise. From the Brussels Journal:

...in the Netherlands polygamy has been legalised in all but name. Last Friday the first civil union of three partners was registered. Victor de Bruijn (46) from Roosendaal “married” both Bianca (31) and Mirjam (35) in a ceremony before a notary who duly registered their civil union.

"Bush is keeping track of Hurricane Rita as it hits his home state of Texas. That's Bush's worst nightmare: an electric chair with no power."
--Jay Leno

-

"Hurricane Rita is supposed to make landfall in Texas, which is good for Barbara Bush because she can insult survivors closer to home."
--Bill Maher

-

"Yesterday President Bush made his fifth visit to the area that received the most damage from Hurricane Katrina. In other words, the White House."
--Conan O'Brien

-

"The president believes the government should be limited not in size, Jon, but in effectiveness. In terms of effectiveness, this is the most limited government we've ever had."
--Daily Show correspondent Rob Corddry

-

"Now here's some sad information coming out of Washington. According to reports, President Bush may be drinking again. And I thought, `Well, why not? He's got everybody else drinking.'"
--David Letterman

"I believe, myself, that George Bush is no kind of Christian -- he's pretending to be a Christian. He's not found God, he's found the party of God -- 17 million people who could propel him to power.

I always put it this way: Christians believe in the prophets, peace be upon them. Bush believes in the profits, and how to get a piece of them."

SAN ANTONIO, Sept. 23 - President Bush was supposed to land here on Friday afternoon on the first stop of a tour intended to make clear that he was personally overseeing the federal government's preparations for Hurricane Rita's landfall. But the weather did not cooperate.

It was too sunny.

[...]

At the Federal Emergency Management Agency's command center in Washington a reporter asked him: "Sir, what good can you do going down to the hurricane zone? Might you get in the way?"

Mr. Bush quickly shot back, "One thing I won't do is get in the way." After explaining the purpose of his trip was to make sure federal, state and local officials coordinate well, he added, "We will make sure that my entourage does not get in the way of people doing their job, which will be search and rescue immediately."

But clearly someone at the White House reconsidered the President's impact. When Mr. McClellan announced that the president had scrapped his trip, he said that with the search-and-rescue team preparing to move with the storm, "we didn't want to slow that down."

Another White House official involved in preparing Mr. Bush's way noted that with the sun shining so brightly in San Antonio, the images of Mr. Bush from here might not have made it clear to viewers that he was dealing with an approaching storm.

["Three Wishes"], a tear-jerking combination of Oprah and "Extreme Makeover: Home Edition," sends Amy to make the "hopes and dreams of deserving people" in small-town America come true. In the first episode, Amy "grants" wishes to an injured young girl in need of expensive surgery and a lovable young boy who wants to surprise his stepfather with an official, public adoption ceremony. Later in the show, an Astroturf field not only brings joy to Sonora, California athletes, but to a cancer-stricken coach, too.

Some reviewers criticize the show's overt product placement and its nauseating sappiness, but the Times Ned Martel digs a bit further to uncover religion as an issue as well. Grant is trying play God in her show, and Martel is the only one bold enough to call her out on it. In his cleverly titled article, "Manna from Hollywood: Charity Begins on TV," he argues that "'Three Wishes' operates like a traveling ministry, with revival tents pitched in a different small town each week." He goes on to describe the masses of "unhealed souls" -- including Catholic nuns -- lined up with the hope of "Grant Herself" answering their prayers.

Every other day
Every other day
Every other day
Every other day of the week is fine (fine), yeah

[phone rings]
JERRY: hello. Oh, hi. What's happening? what? oh um, sure, um, yeah, okay, uh. I'll see you then. Yeah, yeah, Bye.
ELAINE: Who was that?
JERRY: That was Keith.
ELAINE: What's going on?
JERRY: He wants me to help him move.
ELAINE: Help him move? Move what?
JERRY: You know, furniture.
ELAINE: So, what did you say?
JERRY: I said yes, but I don't feel right about it. I mean I hardly know the guy. That's a big step in a relationship. The biggest. That's like going all the way.
ELAINE: And you feel you're not really ready for,?
JERRY: Well we went out one time. Don't you think that's coming on a little too strong?

[Kramer enters]

KRAMER: What's going on?
JERRY: Keith Hernandez just asked me to help him move.
KRAMER: What? Well, you hardly know the guy. What a nerve. You see wasn't I
right about this guy? Didn't I tell you? Now, you're not going to do it are you?
JERRY: I said yes.
KRAMER: YOU SAID YES!? Don't you have any pride or self respect? I mean, how can you prostitute yourself like this? I mean what are you going to do? You're going to start driving him to the airport?
JERRY: I'm NOT DRIVING HIM TO THE AIRPORT!
KRAMER: yeah yeah
JERRY: hey Kramer do me a favour.
KRAMER: What?
JERRY: Don't mention it to anybody.
KRAMER: I wish you never mentioned it to ME. [exits]

Seinfeld, "The Boyfriend, Part 2"

Antiwar Rally Will be a First for Many:

"This demonstration will reflect, by far, the most diverse group of antiwar protesters since before the war began," said Brian Becker, national coordinator for the ANSWER Coalition, one of the event's sponsors. "We have people coming from all political persuasions, including a very large number of people who have never before been part of the antiwar movement or protest activity."

Officials with ANSWER and other sponsoring groups say they expect more than 100,000 people at the protest, which will include speeches at the Ellipse, a march around the White House and an 11-hour concert featuring Joan Baez, Steve Earle, Thievery Corporation and the Coup, among other acts. More antiwar activities will take place Sunday and Monday.

The next Worship Freehouse will be Sunday, October 16th at 7:00 p.m. in the hall above McGuires on 8th Street.

The theme for the next three Freehouses will be "Exploring a Global Faith" and on October 16th we will be looking at global and local poverty and our response to it. There will be some corporate worship, time for reflection, interactive stations, and if you want any food or beverages, McGuires will be staffing our room. If you want to help, fire off an e-mail to thefreehouse@gmail.com.

You can tell by the wind
By fresh cut wood
All stacked to dry
That autumn's here
And it makes you sad
About the crumby
Summer we had

With pine trees creeking
The raven's screeching
Just like the story my grandma tells
About when a bird
Hits your window
And someone you know
Is about to die

Autumn's here
It's ok if you want to cry

Find a sweater
And you'll be better
Until the kindling is tinder dry
We can be quiet
As we walk down
To see the graveyard
Where they are now
I wonder how
They brought their piano
To haldane hill
From old berlin
Be hard to keep it
Well in tune
With winters like the one
That is coming soon
Auntumn's here
It's time to cry now

I think that ghosts like
The cooler weather
When leaves turn colour
They get together
And walk along
These old back roads
Where no one lives
And no one goes
With all their hopes set
On the railway
That never came
So no one stayed
I guess that autumn
Gets you remembering
And the smallest things
Just make you cry.

Autumn's here.

We actually have one of these shaker-things in our apartment "gym."

Maybe I should take it on the Antiques Roadshow?

Welcome to Green Gables -- a photo set of our first apartment, complete with all of its "charms."

Incidentally, we just got a notice from the building manager. She apparently quit her job, due to frustrations with the crazy landlord. Part of her letter to the tenants: "I would like to apologize for any repairs or issues that were not dealt with in my time here."

Saturday, new place to live, here we come!

(I'll be adding pictures of the algae-ridden pool to the set tomorrow, in case you're aching for a swim!)

The Can-do Bush Administration Does... and the Presidency Shines (for twenty-six minutes by Tom Engelhardt.

NBC anchor Brian Williams' blog

Condoleezza Rica skips out on U.N. dinner on women's rights. I suppose she had "better" things to do?

Man builds up 40,000 volt charge of static electricity and instantly regrets touching the metal doornob or giving his girlfriend a kiss --

• "We tested his clothes with a static electricity field meter and measured a current of 40,000 volts, which is one step shy of spontaneous combustion, where his clothes would have self-ignited," Barton said.

Quebec — The Quebec Labour Board has ruled that the closing of a Wal-Mart store this year amounted to a reprisal against unionized workers and has ordered the company to compensate former employees.

The labour board concluded that Wal-Mart Canada, Inc., failed to prove that the closing of its store in Jonquière in April was "real, genuine and definitive" as required under the Quebec Labour Code.

The board will determine the "appropriate remedies" for the former employees later. As many as 79 of the store's 190 former employees filed for compensation under the labour code.

During hearings, the board was told that the retail giant has yet to rescind a 20-year lease on the store building and has made no effort to sublet it. This led the labour board to conclude that the store could reopen and that, under the province's labour code, it was closed as a sanction against employees who were exercising their right to unionize and negotiate their first collective agreement.

[...]

In a separate ruling, the labour board rejected Wal-Mart's request to have access to the names of all employees who signed up to unionize in some of their stores.

The company said it needed the list to defend itself against the union's claim that the Jonquière store closing was an anti-union practice because it substantially reduced the number of employees who supported the unionization drive in Quebec.

The board ruled that, under the province's labour code, the names of persons who sign to become part of a labour organization during union certification proceedings must be kept secret to prevent reprisals.

Adversity builds character," goes the old adage. Except that in America today we seem to be following the opposite principle. The worse things get, the more frivolous our response. President Bush explains that he will spend hundreds of billions of dollars rebuilding the Gulf Coast without raising any new revenues. Republican leader Tom DeLay declines any spending cuts because "there is no fat left to cut in the federal budget."

This would be funny if it weren't so depressing. What is happening in Washington today is business as usual in the face of a national catastrophe. The scariest part is that we've been here before. After 9/11 we have created a new government agency, massively increased domestic spending and fought two wars. And the president did all this without rolling back any of his tax cuts—in fact, he expanded them—and refused to veto a single congressional spending bill. This was possible because Bush inherited a huge budget surplus in 2000. But that's all gone. The cupboard is now bare.

Whatever his other accomplishments, Bush will go down in history as the most fiscally irresponsible chief executive in American history. Since 2001, government spending has gone up from $1.86 trillion to $2.48 trillion, a 33 percent rise in four years! Defense and Homeland Security are not the only culprits. Domestic spending is actually up 36 percent in the same period. These figures come from the libertarian Cato Institute's excellent report "The Grand Old Spending Party," which explains that "throughout the past 40 years, most presidents have cut or restrained lower-priority spending to make room for higher-priority spending. What is driving George W. Bush's budget bloat is a reversal of that trend." To govern is to choose. And Bush has decided not to choose. He wants guns and butter and tax cuts.

Tonight we were supposed to be "creative" and explore our relationship with God via the unspoken word. Here's what I came up with:

Everything in my collage is taken from National Geographic magazines -- which felt sacrilegious enough, ripping beautiful pictures from an almost sacred anthropological source.

I'm not exactly sure how to explain what all is going on in my picture -- there's images or words of doubt, reassurance, memory, solitude, and comfort.

My favorite part of the collage is the picture of a rear-view mirror with the image of an old-timey church in the reflection. It reminds me that no matter where I go, or what path I choose in life, there's an aspect of my faith that will always follow me.